Thursday April 3rd

I woke up with a really bad headache. It’s interesting because just yesterday evening I noticed I had no headache whatsoever (I have them almost daily). I thought back through the week and noticed my head and chronic migraine symptoms have felt pretty good for multiple days, yay!

This morning I chugged some water and am drinking coffee that is 75% decaf and 25% caffeinated. Even though I quit my coffee addiction, I’ve been enjoying the hell out of some mostly decaf coffee. It is the nectar of the Gods. Onto manifestation and hormones…

Aaron Doughty Meditation

I’ve hardcore dabbled in manifesting my dream life in numerous ways. I can say with absolute certainty that manifesting what you want in your life, works. It is wild the things I have manifested. But, I tend to get into ruts. Life will kind of slide back into a “meh” type of existence.

I isolate myself, not work enough, not striving much, not thriving. One day a couple months ago I was annoyed with having a low income and that I kept getting stuck working with only one lower paying client. The work is and everything but it is not sustainable. I find myself asking myself, how did I get here? I am educated, a hard worker, I am reliable, I never call in sick, I am intelligent, considerate, etc. etc. And I deserve better. Why does the career part of my life seem to be my biggest struggle?

A couple months ago, I stumbled upon some Aaron Doughty YouTube videos and hit play. He talked about being the version of you in the reality that you want. He teaches really practical ways to remove the blocks in your energy and nervous system that are keeping you stuck. And wouldn’t you know it, if that same day that I watched a manifestation video and did a manifesting meditation where I focused on bringing in more income, I heard from a client who pays really well and I really enjoy working with them.

This has happened with Aaron’s videos numerous times with these same clients. Their life is really busy and hectic currently so they sometimes don’t have the bandwidth to reach out to me. I’ve been listening to his podcast while at the gym and walking my dog and the one I listened to yesterday reiterated the Frame Technique that he talks about a lot. Him talking about how his life was prior to doing this and after doing it helped it click for me. This could transform my life and gosh darnit I could really use that right about now!

More About Hormones – Yay 😑

I got my hormone levels tested and everything was normal except for the FSH at <0.3. It wasn’t flagged as abnormal on MyChart but in order for it to be considered normal according to the MyChart, would be if someone was pregnant. This is the least pregnant I’ve ever been in my entire life lol! Aka this is for sure not possible.

So, according to “Doctor Google” this would also be a normal FSH for someone pre or during puberty. I’m 39 years old so it’s definitely not that either. I got a message from my doctor saying all my bloodwork turned out to be normal. I wrote back and asked if my FSH was considered low. She said yes… Her explanation didn’t make sense to me but I guess hormones are complicated…🤷🏼‍♀️

Also, if I were in perimenopause (I very well could be) my FSH would be high. The exact opposite of “low”.

I asked the doc at the migraine clinic about Gabapentin possibly wreaking havoc on my hormones. I explained to him that I read that it affects the pituitary gland and the hypothalamus which in theory would mess with body temperature regulation (I’ve had issues with that the past couple years – the exact same amount of years I have been taking Gabapentin) and hormones. He said while in theory that certainly could be true he thinks that Gabapentin wouldn’t explain all of my issues in that department.

He also said that since Gaba has been so widely used for so many years, if it made a noticeable impact on our hormones, the medical community would have seen this in studies and questionnaires done by patients. I thought that made sense and I do trust this guy.

Okay But Pharmaceutical Companies…

After chewing that over for a little bit, I realized well… maybe we don’t have accurate information because pharmaceutical companies are bullshit artists! (obscure Greasy Strangler movie reference)

This doc (actually, medical assistant) really knows his stuff and I do trust him but I know that drug companies for sure conceal information about side effects. Maybe it’s not really being reported like it should. I believe that Gaba has contributed to these issues for me, but I am open to the fact that maybe it has not.