Good morning. It is Monday February the 17th of 2025. A few of my left fingers are numb. It’s not even that cold here in my bedroom and I’ve been wearing gloves all morning. Sometimes body parts become numb for seemingly no reason. (thanks raynaud’s)

I had a particularly stressful week last week. It’s curious that when something stressful happens I basically drop all sense of normalcy. Well, rather, the positive habits that require motivation. Also, after stressful times I feel like I can’t do anything outside of my house, besides simple errands. This past Friday wasn’t super busy but did involve some working that stressed me out, but it wasn’t very busy. Oh, and I was pretty sleep deprived. Saturday I stayed in all day, it was snowy and cold, I enjoy hibernating on those days. I got a lot of organizing done and fasted for 18 hours, yet still felt guilty like I hadn’t done enough. I have been exercising a lot for many months now and I really didn’t get exercise since last Monday 🤯. I can’t believe that. I did some of my physical therapy exercises for my hip on Friday. I might be forgetting some exercising, because I usually do at least a little something every day.

But it’s interesting to notice this, the things that dropped off the priority list when I was presented with new, different, intense stressors.

I am wanting to be a bit more resilient in those times. Overall I am extremely resilient and always come out stronger and better than before, but more in the little things. Like, keeping up with the micro-habits that I have built up. On days when I’m really depressed I keep telling myself just keep moving. Find something to move the body, something to do. Even something like doing the dishes. Just keep moving through the motions. This informs your body and nervous system that we’re okay. We are engaged in life. We can still do when we’re depressed. We can be present with our depression or anxiety, accepting and honoring it, while still doing life.

I have today off hallelujah. I need to finish up organizing my place, go to the gym, do PT, walk Luna… It will feel good to get back to those things and back into my body.